Weekend Photos

I’ve become one of those losers who doesn’t use their camera, but just steals other people’s photos or club photos.

Purple Sneakers.

Friday, February 20th 2009

&

Britpop.

Saturday, February 21st 2009

UGGGHHHH!!

GOD DAMMIT!
I’m so sick of being a bum. I need a job, i need a job, i need a job, i need a job, i need a job. And its so unfair. I try really hard. I check seek everyday, apply for a couple of jobs. Sometimes i get call backs and sometimes i don’t. Sometimes i get interviews and they seem to go well, but then NOTHING. I get nothing in the end. So its not like i’m doing nothing, i am actually trying. And its just so demoralizing that i’m not good enough for anything.

I watched the movie “Zack and Miri Make a Porno” on the weekend. I’m beginning to think that this might be an amazing idea. Except the fact that no one would want to watch a porno if i was in it haha. The film itself was good (i love Seth Rogen), but the ending was just kind of cheesy, abrupt and just not that great. But i enjoyed it.

Today i went on the new Epping to Chatswood line. It was pretty fantastic. Everyone was really excited and i saw several people with cameras/video cameras documenting their experience. Its free for 100 days and seeing im pathetic now and have no life/career, i may as well make the most of it, right?

AHHHHHHHHHHHIUUUUUUUUUUUSFDHSKDDJsahhhhsallllll

Fatigue

I’m tired of being so fucking mediocre.

I’m tired of hearing that i’m good and put in a solid effort, but there was someone better than me.

I’m tired of blending in and not being noticed.

I’m tired of living a life that is going nowhere quickly.

I’m tired of standing still watching everybody around me move forward.

I’m tired of being me

and being here.

I’m exhausted.

Living with a Disease

I found this poem on a message board which pretty much sums up how i feel at the moment. Its funny how you take such simple and obvious things for granted. It could be a lot worse, but i still feel disgusting and alone. But yeah, feeling pretty low about it right now 😦

Avoiding mirrors just in case,
I see another patch on my face.
Wishing that I could be free,
Of this disease inflicted upon me.

Silent tears I cry at night,
Hoping that everything will be alright.
During the day I smile and Laugh,
Do my family know i’m pretending that?

Many people point and ask.
Who are you and what is that?!!
Do you have aids?
Whats wrong with your skin?

I lower my head and refuse to speak,
No wonder people think I’m a freak.
One day I will go outside,
Without the clothes I use to hide.

I will scream and shout,
Flesh and scales all out.
Everyone will stare,
But on that day….

I won’t care.

Valentines Wrap Up

So i had a pretty busy week last week. I had lots of hang outs with the girls, a job interview, saw Abby Dobson live, watched a basketball game and also Valentines Day.

Now, prior to this year, i have never had a real Valentine before. Well, every year my dad buys me chocolates, but thats not really what i mean. This year was different! I actually had a really special weekend. Nick was going to pick me up from work, but i realised i left something at home so i was just going to meet him at my house. And as i was walking down the main road home, i saw him walking towards me in the distance. As he got closer, i realised he was holding something behind his back. A big bunch of red roses he handed to me as we greeted. It was really lovely.

He had planned to take me on a picnic but the weather was too shitty, so we just went for a drive to Palm Beach. We watched the waves crash and we also went for a quick walk around the rocks, but my feet got wet so we had to stop. On the way home i was so exhausted i fell asleep in the car. We chilled for a bit at his place and then got ready for dinner. I wore a revealing pretty black dress and he got all dressed up and wore a nice shirt with dress pants and a jacket. We looked so wonderful. I didn’t know where we were having dinner because it was a surprise, but he had picked a nice Italian restaurant in Glebe. This was a good choice because it was raining so heavily and it was a 5 minute walk away. We had a three course meal -i got stuffed zucchini flowers for my entree, spinach and fetta ravioli for my main and a tirimisu for desert. We also downed a bottle of champagne between the two of us. I was sooooo full by the end of it though. It was a really nice experience though. Its nice to pretend you are fancier than what you are sometimes.

We went back to his for some nookie and relaxing. Its nice being in bed when its raining. The next morning we woke up and were uber hungry, so we drove towards Newtown to get some breakfast. Except i think everyone else in Sydney had that same idea because there was no parking anywhere. So we decided to head to Brighton instead. We went to a restaurant and i got this maaaasssive fish and chips, which was really good, but very filling. He got a margarita pizza but helped me finished of my food.

The rest of the afternoon was just us sitting around and watching Skins. So all and all it was a really nice weekend and its fun to be all cute with someone and get dressed up and be sexy. It should happen more often, not just once a year. Although it would get pretty expensive after a while. Hehe. Oh well.

Here are some photos from the other parts of my week.

P.S.

Britpop at the Abercrombie.
Saturday, February 7th 2009.

Good times, good people.

Rant

I always find Mondays to be the biggest come down. I always have fantastic weekends and then i come home on Mondays and realise i’m back to my old boring monotonous way of living. Being a bum and doing nothing. I always hate how i complain about how shit my life is and its isn’t like i’m not trying to change it. I’ve applied for umpteen jobs and have had a couple of interviews, but no success. I’m beginning to think that (despite my qualifications) i’m looking for work in the wrong industry. I mean if its not happening, maybe thats a sign? I don’t know.

I need some structure/routine to my life again or else i’ll go crazy.

Summer Dayz

Goodness it was hot today (and still is).
As i was coming home from Glebe today i went to the atm to bank a cheque. I followed all the correct procedures. However the atm wouldn’t eat my envelope for some reason. And it also wouldn’t give me back my card. So i went inside to the bank and freaked out at the dude and we solved it eventually and i got my card back. So we were going to deposit the cheque manually/old school style because i have a new fear of atms and the guy asked me, “Why are your fees so high?” To which I responded, “I don’t know. You tell me.” The type of account that i had they no longer offered and there was a new one where i could get cheaper fees and better things. So i had to talk to an Indian lady for a really long time and she sorted me out. Gah. I was there for 45 minutes. Banks are not fun.

Then i came home and slept on the couch for a couple of hours. I decided that i should wash some of my dirty shoes as well, so i did that.

Yes. This is the life of a dropkick. To all of you out there who hate working, at least you are doing something with your life and not being stuck at banks and cleaning shoes.

Here are some photos:

I’m going to make Nick take me to see this pet exhibition at the museum! Doesn’t it look fab?

Alison and I being sexy at Supre.

Fin.

Birthday Weekend

I never update this thing properly anymore. I’ve been pretty busy lately. Not doing anything thats productive. I am still in dire need of employment, but i am working on that one. This weekend was wonderful wonderful wonderful. Lisa’s Birthday Celebrations. And i got to see Nick after being without him for a week. I’d post photos, but i can’t be bothered.

Today i looked at the Valentines Day range on the Tiffany’s website. If i was given a little green box, i would probably die. I hate gushing over expensive shit that i can’t have. Its so unrewarding hahaha.

I’m going to start udpating this properly, soon.